The Scientist

Hey guys! So I’m doing okay.

There’s a whole story about things that have happened to me over the last twenty-four hours. The more spiritual part I’ll record in The Rainmaker Confessions, so you can go there. But here I’ll talk about what happened to me today. Sidenote: I have been sick, and I had not eaten since around six o’clock on Monday (technically Sunday, because I barely ate anything on Monday. I think I lost a ton of weight.)

In my first period I was being an idiot and ignoring Ben (Harry), and then just to be stupid when he left the room I asked this girl named Kira how come he was “mad at me”, which was a totally prideful bold-faced stupid lie and a dumb thing to say. (Wow…run-on sentence.) I warned her not to tell him that I asked. Well, after class I was walking down the hall and I heard Ben call out: “Hey you! You in the red!! Come here.” I thought he was frustrated that I was talking to Julie, a girl he’s having issues with. It turned out that Kira had not listened to me and told Ben that I thought he was mad at me.

Ben gave me a total face-off right there in the middle of the hallway. I was scared almost for my life. I’ve never even known he could be so cold and angry. It ended in him stomping off, leaving me alone in the hall. He walked up to Kira, who had just been passing by, and he said, “I just left Marcus, and now I’m afraid that I destroyed our friendship.” Depressed and regretful, he disappeared into the crowd.

It took me some time to get over my initial shock. Kira and Matt Call tried to talk to me but I refused to open. It seemed like everything was going completely to hell. I didn’t feel like I got my prayers answered last night, and I was going to have a very heart-to-heart prayer/devotional this morning, but my alarm didn’t ring. And my body was feeling worse than usual, stomach and throat wise—and when I say stomach, I don’t mean hungry; that was affecting my body in different ways via extreme lack of coordination, hallucination, trouble sitting down, trouble standing up, etc.

Eventually I ditched my second period and went looking for him. When I found him, I just asked if we could talk. He started acting like everything was all right, and took me around back to outside the school.

There I broke down in front of him and had the most honest face-to-face talk I’ve had with anyone. (Well, I did share my “cloud” with him once, but that doesn’t count.) It was a very final situation; each word of our conversation either pointed to the end of our friendship or a stronger one.

It turned into the latter. Ben took me to get a drink (first one in three or four days) and bought some Goldfish to share with me. We ditched our homeroom advisory period and just hung out. When it was time for his college class, he asked me to come to where he eats lunch, and he would buy me some food for lunch. I thanked him for his friendship and love, and we parted.

I was so happy when I walked into third period. It seemed like that was exactly what I needed.

So I just wanna say that I’m so thankful for my friends and for my God, and that I’m gonna try and be a different person from now on.