When I Pretend

So I'm kinda excited because Mike Shindoa (who is Linkin Park's rapper, for those of you who have not partaken of the wholesome goodness that is Linkin Park) and some other guys started a little sumthin-sumthin, a new band called Fort Minor. They've got some good stuff, with the exception that some stuff swears a bit. But whatever. My favorite song is called "Believe Me", and the lyrics will follow shortly hereafter.

As for a life update, all I can say is getting girls to fall for you needs to be declared an Olympian/Herculean feat. I mean, I don't know how to act around this girl. I have all these things I wanna say around her or do for her or a way to act around her, like I've got these plans...and then the second I see her, it's like she and I are the only people in the world and no one else around us exists, because everything is alive when she's around, and I feel happier when she gives advice because she's so true........sorry, rambling.

Also, I've really got to get down to the boilerplate with my short stories. I want to publish "The Dam at Otter Creek" before my 18th birthday, but I haven't even started writing it. So I've got to get to that, like, right now. Thanks to The Plot Thickens, I have places to go with my characters. So all I have to do is get off my lazy seat and go do it.

By the way, I'm trying out avatars. The current one I'd like to try out is Cloud Strife, as portrayed in the upcoming film Advent Children, which I am really just exploding with impatience for. Please tell me how to upload one because my computer is being a real jerk.

And now for a song about my life right now....


"Believe Me"--Fort Minor, from The Rising Tied, 2005
(Yes, that album title is spelled right.)

I guess
That this is where we've come to
If you don't want to,
Then you don't have to believe me
But I won't be there when you go down
Just so you know now
You're on your own now, believe me.

I don't want to be the one to blame
You like fun and games, keep playing 'em
I'm just sayin' think back then
We was like one and the same
On the right track
But I was on the wrong train
Just like that
Now you've got a face to pain
And the devil's got a fresh new place to play
In your brain, like a maze, you can never escape the rain
Every [darn] day is the same shade of grey.

Hey, I used have a little bit of a plan
Used to have a concept of where I stand
But that concept slipped right out of my hands
Now I don't really even know who I am
Yo, what do I have to say?
Maybe I should do what I have to do to break free
And what ever happens to you, we'll see
But it's not gonna happen with me.

Back then, I thought you were just like me
Somebody who could see all the pain I see
But you proved to me unintentionally
That you would self-destruct eventually
Now I'm thinking like the mistake I made doesn't hurt
But it's not gonna work,
Cause it's really much worse than I thought
I wished you were something that you were not
And now this guilt is really all that I got.

You turned your back
And walked away in shame
All you got is a memory of pain
Nothing makes sense, so you stare at the ground
I hear your voice in my head when no one's around
What do I have to say?
Maybe I should do what I have to do to break free
What ever happens to you, we'll see
But it's not gonna happen to me.

I'll do what I have to do
You're on your own now, believe me
Whatever happens to you,
You're on your own now, believe me
What do I have to say?
You're on your own now, believe me
It's not gonna happen to me
You're on your own now, believe me.