Breaking the Habit

I've willingly fallen so many times today. I've gone to extreme evils and unspeakable measures to sate my hunger for darkness. (Read "Confessions" and "Wicker Poet" for more info.)

But not anymore. I'm gonna do something about it tonight. I'm about to do something about this thing I've created, this person I've made--what I've become. The memories are literally consuming me. "Like opening the wound, I'm picking me apart again." My preference for solitude is harmful, but I have to do this alone. Because he only comes when I'm alone. Kinda like those action movies where the hero comes alone. "You all assume I'm safe here in my room unless I try to start again."

Well, "I don't want to be the one the battles always choose", cause inside I know that I'm the one who'll lose. But now I have to fight. I have to get up and use my cure. I don't know what it can do. Because all I have to go on now is a faded chain of memories.

It's time to end this once and for all. I'm gonna destroy one of us and get my memories back. Settle this... "I'll paint it on the walls 'cause I'm the one that falls. I'll never fight again...and this is how it ends..."

And this is how it ends.

I don't know what's worth fighting for,
Or why I had to scream
But now I have some clarity to show you what I mean
I don't know how I got this way,
I'll never be all right
So I'm breaking a habit,
I'm breaking a habit,
I'm breaking a habit tonight.